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Full Description
Get the inside story on a single gay man's struggle to adopt!
Fatherhood for Gay Men: An Emotional and Practical Guide to Becoming a Gay Dad is the story of one man's journey down the road less traveleda single gay man adopting and raising his two sons. Author Kevin McGarry recounts his passage into parenthood after years of having his natural fathering instincts stifled by the limitsreal and perceivedof being gay. This unique book details the emotional, financial, practical, and social realities of the adoption process for gay men.
From the author: "We take risks by coming out of the closet as gay men and at the end of the day, we are emotionally happier because we took those risks. By coming out, we are being true to who we are. The same goes for anyone, gay or straight, who has gut instincts for parenthood. I knew over the years that I had parenting instincts because I had this incredible envy of other dads. I would watch them with their kids and wish that somehow, I could have that role. It was painful at times because being gay, I didn't think parenting was in my life plan. Had more role models been available to me, the process would have been a little less difficult."
Much more than a how-to guide to adoption, Fatherhood for Gay Men is the personal account of a single gay man's struggle to become a father despite the real and imagined limitations of being a gay man. The book looks at the adoption process (domestic and international) from the inside, providing unique insight into:
conducting a homestudy
costs (fees and expenses)
what countries allow men to adopt
alternatives to adoption
life as a new parent
online resources
and a state-by-state review of adoption laws, categorized by Completely Legal, Favorable Climate, Mixed Success, and Illegal
The book also includes results of the 2000 study by Gillian Dunne, senior researcher for the London School of Economics Gender Institute, of 100 gay fathers and fathers-to-be. Fatherhood for Gay Men: An Emotional and Practical Guide to Becoming a Gay Dad is a heartfelt and heartwarming story of a father's refusal to be denied a family.
Visit the Author's Web site at http://www.fatherhoodforgaymen.com
Contents
Foreword
Preface
Chapter 1. Closet Daddy
Chapter 2. Sacrifices and Trade-OffsKids versus Corvettes
Chapter 3. My Journey to Vietnam
Chapter 4. Being a Gay Dad
Study by Gillian Dunne
Testimonials
Chapter 5. The Adoption Process
Homestudy
Dossier
Medical Reports
BCIS (Formerly the INS)
Chapter 6. How I Chose VietnamDestiny's Children
What Countries Allow Single Men to Adopt?
Chapter 7. The Bottom LineHow Much Does it Cost?
Chapter 8. What Are the Current Laws on Gay Parenting in Each State?
Chapter 9. Other Ways of Becoming a Gay Dad
Surragacy
Coparenting
Chapter 10. Big Decisions
Boy or Girl?
Baby, Toddler, or Older Child?
Transracial Adoption?
Domestic or International?
How Old Is Too Old?
Chapter 11. Preparing for Life With a Baby or Child
Baby Shower
Names
Preparing Your Home
Your Trip
Day Care
Your Social Life
Chapter 12. How to Avoid Problems and What to Do if They Arise
Chapter 13. My Decision to Adopt Again
Chapter 14. Life with Kids
Afterword
Helpful Websites and Listservs
Web Sites
Listservs
Index
